Promise of a new career caused me to take a layover in Austin last month on the way to Maryland. Without extra help, I guarded a three bedroom, two bath home in the South part of town for three days not allowing one intruder to break in the place. For 72 hours, I single handed resisted all comers, including a census taker on the grounds house sitters aren't bona fide residents of a domicile.

May sound easy being a house sitter in the state capital, the center of our justice system and the base of the creation of law and order. But consider these facts: Austin is growing at the rate of 150 citizens per day, meaning even if the crime rate dropped 8% in May as the newspapers claim, and the base figure comes to 8%, a dozen new burglars move to town every day needing to work.

Pinpointing crime in Austin is difficult, especially when the state legislature is in session. Wild charges of misconduct fly from each side of the aisle only to make a quiet landing after the press corps leaves the chambers to meet the day's deadlines. The best guideline to rate most of these gentlemen and ladies of glib tongues and eternal smiles is to consider them guilty until a break in the case, or a loophole in the law proves them innocent. However, as long as the worthies are on the capital grounds, the Chief of Police can't be blamed for what it takes to put on such a good show.

The huge Texas University student body further complicates defining the city's crime rate. The problem lies where library fines and parking tickets combined with spirited misbehavior on and off campus stop, and rigging pay phones and utility meters, breaches of promise, hazing and general civil disobedience become a criminal act. The wisest approach here, I think, is denial. Just act as if the 10's of thousands of U.T. students do not exist.

Also, keep in mind, Forbes magazine polled Austin as the best place to do business in the United States. This is for sure to have gained wide interest among the lawless. Upon reading the news, small town crooks probably took a deep look at the future in robbing the gum ball machine in front of the VFW Hall, or nicking the take at the newspaper rack in front of the bus station as the coin box fills in nickels.

Visions of the spoils of a high tech Austin economy is bound to flashed before their eyes. Thirty six hundred dollar lap tops, portable as a pair of roller skates and as merchantable as Krugerand arose in their dreams as sharp as the symbol of sugar plums of legend and verse. Eight hundred dollars worth of hubcaps flicked off 4 wheels of a Jaguar clanging on the curb made a tantalizing sound of easy money. The more creative envisioned kidnapping the groomed lap dogs the Austin rich hold in such high esteem. Others less ambitious thought of all the custom garden tools and thick rubber hoses just waiting to be snatched inside open garage doors.

But the hard part of my jobs was being on duty day and night, having to take calls. A.T. & T. rang on the hour wanting to sell long distance services. Spring and M.C.I. hit three times a day at meals. A. L. "Laudy" Jefferson's lawn service slipped a card under the door. "Try-Back Pizza" hung a coupon for a 12 inch free pie on the front door knob. And "Billy Marie's Beauty Shop" posted a rose colored circular offering three dollars off on a "perm."

In the day light hours, I scanned the back yard through a big picture window, sitting in a web backed rocking chair. Except for a rolling pen, I was unarmed. The only six shooter I own is a Colt I keep in the bank box in Mertzon. After all of my boys sneaked the old gun out for surreptitious target practice as ranch kids have done since the invention of gun powder, I stored it in the bank box to keep it from disappearing the way 4 or 5 pair of good spurs have been lost. The pistol wouldn't have helped anyway, unless the attack was on the right flank in line where the cylinder spits pieces of lead hot and fast as shrapnel.

I took regular naps and read three novels. Hardest physical work was rolling the trash can down to the curb for regular pickup. I am not going to charge a fee until I become more experienced. Having the Austin job on my resume is going to going to look good in out away places like San Angelo. I know the folks I worked for will give me a good recommendation.

June 8, 2000